Why Else Would Villains Have Fans?
by Chibi Honda Chan
Summary: Rated R for strong language. A Hiroto Honda defense story. A rant in Honda POV, showing the lovable side of the spike-headed brunet.


~Rantings~  
  
~A Honda-supporting Fanfic~  
  
Summary: To at least *try* to get Honda in the clear a bit more. I have read too many Honda-bashing fanfics, it's sickening. I happen to like Honda, so I'll let the brunette speak in his own defense. There are some mild spoilers. Rated PG for language. Cuz Honda is not happy.  
  
~ Story Start! ~  
  
~ Hiroto Honda POV ~  
  
It's obvious I'm hated. Clear as fucking day. It's those blind assholes that refuse to see me that hate me. I'm overlooked, underrated, there "only for comic relief, and even then, it's pathetic."  
  
Are they blinded that much by their love for Yugi? For Yami? Ryou, Jounouchi, Seto, Bakura, PEGASUS?!?  
  
Even Bandit Keith is liked more than I am.  
  
. . . Not that I'm saying that's a *bad* thing. It's nice to see somebody loathed by the economy has managed to find some fans.  
  
So why not me?  
  
I'm one of the main people in the series! And how many people hate me?  
  
I don't do much in the series. Why not, you ask? When do I get a chance? That's my reason.  
  
I'm not a duelist. Excuse me, but I find a hell of a lot more comfort in a good fistfight rather than slapping cards against a table. I don't like the card game. I carried around the cards briefly. Even then, Jounouchi stole the glory from them. Remember, it was *my* Swamp Battleguard that helped Jounouchi defeat the Serpent Knight Dragon.  
  
In a way, I guess I *did* duel. So why the hell do you put me down?!?  
  
Let me tell you a little bit about myself. Aside from being completely disgusted at the fact people failed to see the real Hiroto Honda, I'm noble. I'm brave, smart, strong. Like Jounouchi, only perhaps the smallest bit weaker and a lot smarter.  
  
(Even Jounouchi fans have to admit my best friend isn't the brightest crayon in the box...)  
  
Please, fangirls, do not get me wrong. In no way will I make this a place where I put down my friends, or the other people in the show.  
  
Which brings me to another point. I'm not lovable for everybody out here, but I'm *loving*. Don't get me wrong. I don't want to make out with everybody I see. It'd raise too many questions. But personally, I don't hate anybody. I can detest them, but there is a thick line between detest and hatred. I can hate what a person does, but I will never be able to hate that person. I can hate how Bandit Keith locked us in the cave after Jounouchi defeated his little buddy in a duel. But he had a hard past. I can't hate him for that. I can hate how Pegasus did everything possible to make Yugi's life a living hell. But he wished to see his own loved one once again, so I can't hate him. (Heh. I'm just a pathetic romantic. Can'tcha tell?) I can't hate Seto, even after he put practically threw Jounouchi and Yuugi into the dirt.  
  
Malik? Confusion had possessed him, then a psychotic Yami. Can you hate a confused person?  
  
If anybody, the people I come close to hating are Bakura and Marik. Or, most of you know them as Yami no Bakura and Yami no Malik. (Or maybe, you simply know them with the 'no' parts in their names.) They had no noble motive. I can't stand those people.  
  
Strong sense of detest. Maybe not as strong as hate.  
  
This is a good one I've heard a lot. "Hiroto Honda is boring."  
  
Remember the Swamp and Lava Battleguard episode? Y'know, Jounouchi vs. Ryuusaki. Think back to before the Swamp Battleguard was played. The flashback. Who was the guy helping Jounouchi fight those thugs? *Ahem!* Sure, Jounouchi said he didn't need my help, but please, that's just Jounouchi speaking.  
  
Jounouchi and I have been friends for the longest time. WAAAAAAY before Jounouchi ever met Yugi. That's the most you know about my past.  
  
Is that why I'm boring, fanfic writers? No past to dwell on, no troubled parents, no abuse, no moving, no nothing?  
  
Why should that be a problem? If anything, it should make my character more enjoyable to write. Make my dad worse than Jounouchi's. Make random, OC thugs from years ago beat me up, as long as I can take a couple of swings at them, too. For all I fucking care, make me a goddamned fallen angel!  
  
. . . That last one didn't sound too bad, actually. . .  
  
Anyway, the point I'm getting at is simply this: You don't *have* to hate somebody with a clouded past. Ryou's past is clouded. Did you know he had a sister? And the most we ever see of him or his past is the inside of his house? His Yami, a 5000-year-old spirit, had a better-revealed past than the poor albino does. And Ryou, by himself, is almost as useless as I am, if not more.  
  
Think about it. All this guy does is serve as a vessel for a psychotic Yami. He's a duelist, yes, but do we ever see *him* duel? His Yami steps up to the plate when it comes to card games.  
  
But you *love* him!  
  
. . . I see we have some arguments over here.  
  
"But he's cute! He's so adorable! We can't hate him! He's too cute to hate!"  
  
That's not a fact. Some people may find him ugly. But before you get mad at me, I wasn't saying *I* was one of those people that find Ryou ugly. Personally, I think Ryou's a cutie, too. (But please, don't take that the wrong way.) People think Ryou's cute. Some people find me cute, too. There's just not as many.  
  
"But he's constantly abused by his Yami! Don't you read stuff? Pity him!"  
  
. . . Abused? Show me a part in the Manga when Yami Bakura flays Ryou. No self-mutilation, no possession. The worst I've seen this guy do to Ryou was cut *himself* with a knife. It caused problems later, but I don't think the problems were intended. And he never wanted Ryou actually dead.  
  
He did, you say? That fight against Marik? He lost and didn't seem to care?  
  
Well, he seemed pretty confident he'd win. And even if he lost, he had a backup plan, started a while ago. Manga... 19, I believe? Anyway, Ryou doesn't have a clue his Yami even exists anymore. Which was why he was so broken up when he wasn't let into Yugi's soul room in later parts of the Manga. Because of his unknown-to-Ryou Yami.  
  
But that's beside the point.  
  
There is no proof in the Manga that Yami Bakura abuses, or ever abused, poor Ryou. But you seem so fond of the idea and constantly have his Yami injure Ryou. Isn't that the point of fanfiction? You take a character and put his or her in a certain situation and write out how they'd react. Change whatever you like, hair color, eye color, time, location, personalities. It's fanfiction, so it doesn't have to be faithful to the original.  
  
So why not? You seem keen to abuse Ryou. You seem eager to bring out the worst of Jounouchi's father. I've actually seen many fanfictions where *Yugi's* father hurt our little spiky-haired friend.  
  
Why not make up my past? (I'm repeating what I've said before. Sorry.)  
  
Now, let's see what else I'm shunned for, shall we?  
  
I'm shunned because people think I'm ugly, and they don't like my hair. Who here has ever wondered what my hair looks like when it was *down?* For all you know, the spike could be natural. But for all you know, I could use an entire case of hair gel for it. As for the "ugly" comment, it's an opinion. Other people find me drop-dead sexy. So you wouldn't dare to insult me like that. Because, just like there are rabid-Yugi fans or rabid-Ryou fans, there are rabid-Honda fans. They will hurt you. Some people might've already figured that out.  
  
I'm glad for the fans. They aren't shallow bastards like most of the Honda haters are. Most of the Honda bashers are Jounouchi fans, Seto fans, Ryou fans, and/or Yugi fans. They probably can't stand the fact I'm not as "important" as they are in the show/manga, or I don't have the same personality as they do, therefore, I'm a pathetic bastard, a stupid git, and many other numerous things. Rapist? Okay, sure! Why not? Amnesiac? Fine, we'll make him that, as well! Stupid, annoying, backstabbing son of a bitch with nothing better to do than to make the main characters' lives a living hell, alongside with Anzu? All right!  
  
Halfway decent character? Nooo, Hiroto Honda'd *never* be the type to help out! He's just there to get in the way! He's just there to insult everybody! He's just there to fill in an otherwise empty space, terrorize the characters' siblings or the characters, themselves, and to look stupider when he has no clue what the hell is going on!  
  
I hate the people that think that way.  
  
Why can't you people look beyond the bayonet running through my head?!! Why can't you try to find the true Hiroto Honda?!! How the hell can you be so shallow as to bastardize a person Yugi *accepted* into his little group of friends?!!  
  
As much as you stupid bashers would hate to admit, Yugi *accepted* me! Mou hitori no Yugi, AKA Yami no Yugi accepted me! If I were as much as a bastard as you all portray me in your stories, I'd be nothing more than a little blip in the Shadow Realm! I'd be deader than a fucking doornail! Mou hitori no Yugi would've already made me a smear on the sidewalks!  
  
But I'm still here, ladies and gentlemen.  
  
I know another reason you hate me. I'm a pervert. Can you blame me? I'm a teenage boy! So I made Yuugi buy me some skin magazines earlier on. Big fucking deal! Jounouchi tried to lend Yugi a porno tape. Little, innocent Yugi got excited when he heard that girls playing basketball in skirts was an easy way to sneak a look at their delicates. And not to mention Jounouchi's idea for the yearly festival. "The High School Girls Cabaret! The girls will dress up in outfits that will appeal to every man's dream, and---" "Sit down, Jounouchi!" Not to mention how, in the later Mangas (think very recent), Jounouchi even agreed to follow me to the harem when we were in the past, where Mou hitori no Yugi was posing as Pharaoh.  
  
Suddenly, my acts as a pervert seems a little less obvious, doesn't it?  
  
As for useless, you don't have a fucking clue. I'm strong enough to carry people on my back. Even the hefty Sugoroku, Yugi's grandpa. He ain't no feather, that's for sure. And what they left out in the Animè was Kaiba's Death-T, where I almost fucking died after saving Yugi and company from a stack of collapsing crates during the game.  
  
But the Animè gave me a good cover. Remember the Big Five Arc, just before the Battle City finals?  
  
I didn't think so.   
  
Oh, yeah! The dubs aren't that far yet! Well, basically, an original Kaiba, named Noa Kaiba, stalked us in a freaky-assed virtual reality game, actually killing *me* in the process and implanting my brain into a robotic monkey.  
  
Go ahead! Laugh it up! I died because I was protecting Shizuka-chan! You remember, right? Jounouchi's sister? I took a shot that was intended for her and died! (And then, my brain got implanted into a robotic monkey. But I made one *hell* of an adorable robotic monkey!)  
  
And I have a motorbike! Can you seriously, honest-to-God, hate a guy with a motorbike? And don't say no. I know when you lie.  
  
As for being backstabbing, recall my talk to you about Death-T and the Big Five Arc. I nearly died to save Yugi. I *did* die to save Shizuka. And for one more example, I tried to save Mokuba from the dungeon. I didn't give him to Yami no Bakura. I fought him. I *won* against him. I even chucked the Sennen Ring out of the building. Even though he got it. And I am a loyal friend to Yugi, Anzu, Jounouchi...  
  
Speaking of Jounouchi...  
  
The next case is about Shizuka. Shizuka Jounouchi. The little sister of my best friend, Katsuya Jounouchi. Yes, Jounouchi is his last name, not his first, Japanese-ignorant people. Anyway, I visited Shizuka-chan *constantly* during Battle City. I let her know who was winning the duels Jounouchi fought in, giving her added faith in her brother. Sure, I lied to her a few times, but I was trying to lighten her spirits. Lighten the mood.  
  
But the point was, I was up there. With Shizuka. I was trusted enough by Jounouchi to look after her while he was dueling to his heart's content. I was trusted with Shizuka's safety by her older brother. If it were somebody else up there, helping Shizuka through (as in, somebody not so close to Jounouchi), 'Onii-chan' would've decked them!  
  
Think about it. Would Jounouchi allow Seto or Otogi to watch her sister? Nope. I'm a close friend. Which gives me the ability to watch Shizuka. And I did a good job, too! You can't say I didn't!  
  
What makes me say that, you ask? Well, I never made her cry. She's still alive. She has my cell phone number. (Of course, that may just be an extra instead of a reason...)  
  
Anyway, Jounouchi trusted me to look after his sister. Isn't that a plus? (Plus, who was the guy who found Jounouchi after the Rare Hunters/Ghouls beat him up and took his Red Eyes? That was me.)  
  
And I'm not clumsy. Not by a long shot, fanfic writers.  
  
I didn't expect myself to talk for this long. I must've lost you halfway through, so let me sum this up, in terms you pathetic Honda-bashers should be able to understand: Don't judge the people by how they look, or how much they do in the story. Delve deeper into them. Tear them apart if you have to, just to get to know them better. There is so much more beneath the surface. Image is only the tip of the iceberg. Personality is what makes the character what they really are. The personality is what truly brings the fans to a person.  
  
::Laughs:: Why else would the villains have fans?  
  
o~ One click, one statement, one giant range of emotions. Those are the words that explain the review. Why not give it a try? ~o 


End file.
